Megaquakes that drive, shake, and test

One thing is for sure.  I will die.  Everyone does.  However, the unexpected death of someone close is really difficult because I share time and space with that person.  And sharing time and space is the definition for me of being close.  When suddenly I have time to spare because that person is not with me, or when I am not sharing the same space to hear laughs and cries, to see smiles and piercing eyes, I more than miss that person.

Soon, a person uses replacement therapy in order to move on.  That helps for one to see that productivity is still the number one way to refocus the missing time and place.  It works, but the memories of the time and space shared with another continues in the quiet, tranquil, and reflective moments.

Three times in my life I have experienced missing time and space with someone of great importance to me... once when I was in college, another time when my son had just finished high school, and again when I changed a steady job for a consulting job.  Those three times registered the megaquakes in my life that defined who I was and am now.  The first loss drove me to define the parameters of religion in my life.  The second shook my world view until the replacement for it changed radically.  I had to learn that acceptance was much more valuable than control.  The third loss was not a physical death.  But, the definition was the same.  It tested my lesson of acceptance, and I have never been the same.

The three megaquakes in my life, the unexpected deaths, have taught me, ironically, how to live.  I am grateful to them for that.  So, when that one sure thing happens to me, I will be a great deal different from when I first started and hope my death will have that same irony for someone else.