Date stamped

I remember talking with my college roommate about a decade or more ago about some research in my field that applied to his profession of counseling.  The published articles were about gender and language.  We specifically talked about the feminine characteristics of the "counseling session" as it existed at that time.  Years have intervened since then, so I thought that maybe the ideas from that time had been thought about more by those teaching counseling in the universities.

Until today... I saw a man who has been peripherally involved in counseling.  He filmed an interview with a female author because he liked a book that she had written.  His introduction to the filmed interview included a comment for men to listen because this woman was saying things that would help both men and women.

First, if a man interviews a woman and feels the need to tell men in his audience not to tune out a message because the messenger is a woman, I know his psyche is stuck somewhere in a world before 1975.  That's never a good sign for up-to-the-minute information.  Second, if a man feels the need to suggest to other men who are already voluntarily listening to a filmed video clip that they need to listen, the man has a control issue or a low self esteem without going further.  I listened critically from that point on because his issue is not mine.  Third, if a man recommends a book that is based on anything close to a psychological premise and is written by a woman, I know he is thinking that the information is differently formatted from a male's general organizing pattern.  It is a signal that information is going to be based on personal experience without taking personality into account, and and it pervades what will be said.

My expectations didn't let me down.  I heard the woman speaking give a lot of personal experience, make mostly generalizations about transferrence of her experience to the audience at large, and no allowances were made for differing personalities among people.  The experience left me high and dry. While I am pretty sure universities have moved down the time continuum in how they teach psychology today, it was clear this man and woman were stuck in a time zone prior to the modern age.  Language acts as a date/time stamp on an event.  Fortunately, for this one, the amount of time was short, considering the context.  I escaped with my life this time.